So I’m not exactly sure what happened between April and June, but since June/July work became crazy, I stopped doing pole dancing and withdrew from the online social group.
During the summer I didn’t really take a break and tried to catch up with work that I’d not manage to finish during July whilst trying to prepare myself for doing a part of my job I’d never done before in August- I guess an impossible task!
Looking back it was a bad decision, I went away for 2 weeks on my own but spent quite a bit of it working and then when I went back wasn’t really refreshed and because I was just continuing to take on more and more work no-one saw there being an issue that I had too much work. So things got on top of me and the dating thing stopped. Was that a subconcious decision? I’m not sure. Up until the point of my bad night out I was really enjoying life, but that night really knocked me. I guess it’s that whole fear of people rejecting you- not a nice feeling.